Reset Your Buttons Blog
Take inventory of yourself as you go through your day.
– Mary Elizabeth Murphy, RESET Your Buttons
Are you ready to improve your response time while reducing your reactions, or worse yet, your over-reactions? Take time today and do a systems check. It is your personal inventory. A few moments to notice what you are Feeling, Thinking, Sensing. If you need a reminder set a timer on your phone or computer to alert you every 20 to 45 minutes. Perhaps a simple sticky note on your computer screen or bathroom mirror will do the trick.
Physical awareness (how are you feeling?) Short or shallow breathing, tightening of muscles, faster heartbeat OR easy breathing with long smooth breath from your abdomen instead of your chest, relaxed muscles, normal heartbeat.
Be aware of your thoughts. (what are … Read More »
Whether it’s in the workplace or in our personal lives, trust is key for strong relationships. To brew good chemistry comes down to getting to know one another. It is never as simple as merely spending time around a person; after all, hundreds of couples get divorced every year, saying after it’s all over, “I was married to Jane for twenty-five years and never knew she loved Frankie Valli!” We can’t simply absorb these pieces of knowledge through osmosis.
Our co-workers, friends, family and significant others must allow us to learn about them. In order to do that, they must trust us. Being effective in your relationships means knowing how to build trust. The stronger that bond of trust is, the more straightforward and open your channels of communication will be. It’s about understanding one another and how pushing buttons can … Read More »
Basic animal nature mandates that we see any change in our lifestyle or environment as a problem. If we then view that problem as a threat, our fight or flight instincts will engage. Change is inevitable. It is occurring around us all the time. Rather than seeing each problem as a threat, see it as an opportunity. The way we make that transition has to do with our perception. Keith Ayers, founder of the Integro Leadership Institute has a simple yet impactful model depicting two different Change Cycles: the Maintenance Cycle and the Growth Cycle. For example, when change occurs, the first place to look is at your reaction to it. If you are behaving defensively then that is a signal that you perceive the change as a threat. At this point you are in the Maintenance Cycle. The goal … Read More »
Thinking of the phrase “on purpose” may conjure up negative thoughts. As a child, and even as an adult, you may have heard yourself saying “you did that on purpose.” While you may have been programmed to think this phrase was bad, it’s time to “RESET” your thoughts on this phrase and learn it is key to your success. When you RESET your thoughts “on purpose” it is because you want to know that what you are doing has purpose and that it is “on purpose.” Your efforts should have meaning, count for something and matter. Ask yourself these questions to transform your negative message, feelings and attitude about “on purpose” and to achieve the following goals:
Getting Through the Day: What deliberate action(s) can I take to move through my day “on purpose,” instead of because I have to, … Read More »
Transitions in life are inevitable. Have you ever felt resistance through a transition? What happens if you do nothing in response to it? The reality is transitions will happen at their own pace. It has been said that change is the only constant, which is so true. While change can often be unpredictable or beyond our control, it’s how we deal with a transition that is key. Give yourself permission to be in transition and allow yourself the time that it takes, be courageous and committed to seeing the process through. Learn how to RESET your mind and attitude and embrace the transition proactively. Jim Eisenheimer wrote a “T&D” magazine article entitled “The Art of Transition.” He makes a comparison with transitions and triathlons and states, “It’s your skill at the hidden art of the transition that can make … Read More »
We use the RESET model to navigate life on a daily basis. But every once in a while life will lob a curveball at us, negative and positive stimuli alike which seem to spring from nowhere at all but which heavily impact our relationships as well as day’s, week’s, or life’s path from that point on. No one expects a curveball. Unlike major league pitchers, life doesn’t tip off what kind of pitch it’s going to throw. Reacting to and coping with life’s curveballs is a tricky prospect, because most times such events will push all of our buttons, not just one or two. After all, what’s really happening is that some unforeseen, unexpected occurrence has shifted your worldview, even if just for a few hours. If there is one button to focus on during this time, it is your … Read More »
Each of us has our own unique personality, which includes our own way of behaving. When you’re looking to RESET Your Buttons®, it’s crucial that you understand yourself and your behavioral tendencies. For example, most of us are unable to predict how we will behave when frightened. When your behavior and reactions become unpredictable, so may the behavior and reactions of those around you. That can create a volatile mixture.A fear-driven situation is one in which a person is driven so far out of his or her comfort zone that their assumptions about that situation are challenged.
In RESET Your Buttons®, we call this pushing the Expectations button. When you wake up in the morning, you expect the sky to be up, the ground to be down, red to be red and blue to be blue. Any other scenario could make … Read More »